Exciting news! I finally settled on a title! It's called "Stories to Tell". My friend read this, and he let me know (in no uncertain terms) that he was confused. So, I'll explain again.

The entire objective of this story was to be about the smeethood of Zara, Maria and I. I tried as hard as possible to have it form to all three of our charactors. It's been fun insofar, if only because I can pretty much write about any misadventure that pops into my head, which is always fun.

I'm calling it Stories to Tell because it's a bunch of fun and shocking stories anyone would tell if they had it under their belt, if only to scare the children. I'll try and change the name on the other post but, if not, part one should be called Maria's Story. I'll also be working on another story for Zara's birthday, so bear with me.

And yes, I'll take story requests (Gabby).

SO! After far to long an author's note, enjoy!


Needless to say, Purple never really liked us after that. However, everyone was becoming anxious. The Great Assigning was gearing up!

The Great Assigning had been called different names in Irken history, but had never been brought to as full a scale as this one would be. There was rising tension among every single Irken in the academy, and some ambitious ones were already using some tactics to sabotage others. In fact, Purple had to program a lock into everyone’s notebooks so that it was impossible to be hacked (and I’m sure you can imagine the joy he felt at having to secure all forty-six of Tenn’s). Nonetheless, I found the studies easy enough, especially since myself, Purple, Zara and Red were all in the same classroom that had curriculum designed specifically for those that are taller, in order to prepare us for major leading rules in the Irken Armada.

Poor Tenn was stuck, as she was probably the shortest Invader in the Academy, in the very last ranks, stuck in a classroom for twelve hours a day with some insane boy that seemed to get a kick that she was shorter than him. She complained on more than one occasion of wanting to smash his PAK, but after he was transferred to Vort Research Station 9 as a scientist, she cheered up a bit.

In any case, it was around this time that Zara and I got the bright idea to hack into our student records and see what was written about us. It took us a good half hour, but we eventually hacked into the Control Brains, which was admittedly pretty stupid, but you must understand how sacred those files are.

Each Irken that has ever lived has a file. The entire point of the file is to analyze any Irken member of society. Their strengths, weaknesses, quirks, the opinions that have been made of them, their physical appearance, personality traits, their voice’s, their grades, their intelligence levels, high scores; it was an exact copy of a PAK, but organized every single thing about a person and what it means. This included teacher’s opinions, the Tallest’s opinion, any close relations, and if the subject is a liability to the Armada, making it a…*shutter* defect.

Not many people know of the files, but since we were both in advanced clearance, we both knew of the records. And I’d just like to say that, for some of the most important records ever, if your username is ARMADA and password ADAMRA, don’t be too shocked if someone hacks it.

In any case, we dug out the files. And were amazed. We knew it had knowledge, but to see it pass by the screen… it was amazing.

So when we realized 1) We wouldn’t have time to read it all and 2) It was a miracle we hadn’t been discovered already, we did the next best thing.

We soon had printouts for myself, Zara, Purple, Red and Tenn, and to say that it was a lot to carry would be like saying that the Irken milita was a threat, or that doughnuts were OK, or that idiots were a LITTLE annoying. I think I may have done permanent damage to myself. In any case, we sent signals to Red, Purple and Tenn, screaming with joy at being able to crack the system and doubled over in pain from the weight. They burst into the library where we had all agreed to meet, Tenn on her six (yet another innovation from her) spider-like legs and Red and Purple running in. We all snatched up our papers, shaking with anticipation, and started reading.

Though I won’t go into big detail with it, let me just say I was stunned. It was as accurate as it they’d read my PAK, scanned my mind, as if I wrote it myself. And it was scary, too.


SEX: Female

NAME: Maria

TRAINING TO BE: Invader, Tallest


HEIGHT: 6 ells 3 nays

Okay. This was fine. Not scary or anything.

NAMED AFTER: Not yet specified

THREAT STATUS: Subject is prone to freedom of thinking, yet remains deeply loyal to Irken race.


CURRENT RELATIONS: Zara, Red, Purple, Tenn, Skoodge, Zee, Chin, Nen, El

That is where it became surreal. Threat status? However personal, everyone agreed to start passing around the papers.


SEX: Male


TRAINING TO BE: Invader, Tallest


HEIGHT: 6 ells 5 nays

NAMED AFTER: Eye color

THREAT STATUS: Prone to emotional states


CURRENT RELATIONS: Purple, Maria, Chin, Zara, Tenn, Zee, Skoodge, Nen, El



SEX: Male

NAME: Purple

TRAINING TO BE: Invader, Tallest


HEIGHT: 6 ells 5 nays

NAMED AFTER: Eye color



CURRENT RELATIONS: Red, Zee, Chin, Zara, Tenn, Maria, Nen, El



SEX: Female

NAME: Zara



HEIGHT: 5 ells 2 nays


THREAT STATUS: Abuses power, freedom of thinking


CURRENT RELATIONS: Maria, Tenn, Purple, Red, Chin, Zee, Nen, El



SEX: Female

NAME: Tenn



HEIGHT: 3 ells 4 nays

NAMED AFTER: Foreign poet? Antennae? Number? UNKNOWN

THREAT STATUS: HIGH. Prone to free thinking, emotional suppression, rebellion


CURRENT RELATIONS: Maria, Zara, Purple, Red, Zim


It was quite silent for a while after this. Even Purple, who usually was screaming about something, was silent. Something broke this after a bit, though, and thus everyone started yell over one another. I was trying to get Red’s attention, who was calming down Purple, who was screaming and was being yelled at by Zara to shut up, who was being reprimand by Tenn to calm down. Eventually, the tension rose, and we all just started screaming at one another, which was finally quieted by everyone staring at Tenn in shock as she cursed the Armada, its name, what it stood for, the social hierarchy of the tallest and something else I couldn’t quite catch when she resorted to a few different languages. As it turns out, Tenn does in fact have an accent. Where I have a pretty normal way of speaking, albeit with a clear undertone, Zara spoke with slight royal flair, Red had a monotone and Purple a lilt, she had… this bizarre way of speaking. Not only was her manner of speaking so old-fashioned, she would clip the second syllables of some words off completely, drag out the syllables of others, roll her r’s, clip or drag out her s’s, let her voice rise and fall and put an odd emphasis on certain letter combinations.

I guess the point is, we never really listened to her closely, and it came as a verbal slap in the face to hear her screaming like that. She finally ran out of steam and, still muttering thing’s I won’t repeat, sat down, sucking in her first breath of full air in a while.

“Any particular reason, Tenn?” Zara asked, her patronizing tone a mask for concern.

“Just the fact that we’re being watched, tested and marked for slaughter, Zara. Look here.” And she held up the last sheet of her packet, which she must have finished while everyone gawked at the cover of the information.

POSSIBLE DEFECTIVE’ it read, big, bold, italicized and underlined.

“Don’t you see? We’re mere puppets to the armada, things to be molded into shape, not actual beings. For Irk’s sake, any type of emotional attachment to ANYTHING is considered abnormal, never mind controlling it. Free thinking is a threat! Creativity, individualization, thinking beyond destruction! We have so much territory, and we have not a clue what to do with it! We’re destroying and conquering, wasting all these resources, and there’s no point if we can’t do anything productive with it!”

Everyone was silent. Irken minds are not trained to think past the mission; any plan made by a superior is law, and no one has an ounce of logic or common sense in them. But Tenn coming out and saying this… it was odd, and refreshing.

“So then, intelligent one,” Purple said, bored tone in voice. “What do YOU plan on doing about it?”

There are not many things that I fear. I am a highly rational being. I am scared of two things; water and doughnuts. However, even I know that destruction lurks in Tenn’s twisted, lopsided smirk.

“I have an idea. Let’s just say to be careful during the Assigning.”

Can anyone tell where I’m going with this? Heh, maybe it wasn’t ALL Zim’s fault…

I try the concept of rebellion because, come on, it’s pretty awesome. I tried to keep as close to the real storyline of I.Z. as possible, and on the main Wiki it said he (Zim) worked there. So, after far too long, I update this. Please pretty please with cherries on top review or leave me a message.



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